½ Price Shakes After 8 PM

by Vaughan Grey

            After dropping off his final fare of the evening, all Elias wanted was a chocolate milkshake. He’d been driving non-stop for almost twelve consecutive hours, which was the maximum time the TotalRide rideshare company allowed. Elias gazed in the rearview mirror and saw his gaunt double chin and bags appearing under his eyes. He casually glanced at his earnings tab, which showed a grand total of $111.22, a fair amount for a weekday. His app screen chimed, making him jump, “You have been tipped!” Elias rolled his tired eyes. “Three dollars?! What can I possibly buy with that?”

            Elias drove onto the main street, distracted by the intense neon lights of the local Sonic restaurant. All he could think about was annihilating his otherwise vegan-friendly diet with some unnecessary lactose product.

            Elias pulled into the drive-through, scanning the copious list of delicious options on the menu kiosk. He cleared his dried-out throat. The intercom malfunctioned so he repeated his order several times. Too tired to care.

            Elias pulled within spitting distance of the rear bumper of a 1996 VM T30 van. He observed a young female employee, around 18, walk out of the restaurant delivery door, approach the van, and argue with the driver. Elias couldn't make out what was said, but could tell the young woman had a lot to say. Twenty minutes since Elias pulled up. Still no shake.

            When the young woman finally brought out his milkshake, Elias noticed the girl’s uniform nametag, “Carmela”. He didn’t believe it was her actual name. She seemed like one of those girls who worked an extra night shift to pay her salon bill, judging by the amount of product and bleach in her hair. He suddenly remembered that his Emile was one of those girls, too...once.

            “Chocolate milkshake?” the “alleged” Carmela asked.

            Elias nodded, pulling out his phone to access Google Pay. Rear lights dimmed on the van in front and it drove off.

            An older female employee shouted to Carmela, “The van. Was it that woman?”

            “Yeah, she's stalking us again,” Carmela handed Elias’ phone back, “Know what? This one's on us! Sorry for the wait,” and she waltzed back into the store.

            Elias sipped his free milkshake. Then, he recalled Emile holding their infant son in their kitchen in better times. Until two years ago, Emile was his wife. They had a son, Israel. They lived in a two-story house that looked like a condemned building from a drug war film of the early 90s. The town had fallen on hard times after the crash of 2008. Soon, everyone's house fell into disrepair, if they had a house. Elias and Emile's house was the worst of the lot, but they refused to leave. They had a child to shelter.

            They couldn’t afford electricity but found ways to amuse themselves by candlelight. They’d play hide and seek with Israel. Emile had gotten so good at hiding, sometimes it took Elias hours to find her in the nooks and crannies of the house. Hiding was one of Emile's hidden talents. A day came when no matter how hard Elias tried, he couldn't find Emile. Day two, he contacted the police who declared Emile a missing person. Naturally, Elias was the #1 suspect in her disappearance. There was no corpse, so he wasn’t charged. Despondent and overwhelmed as a suddenly-single father in financial depression, he soon found himself declared an incompetent parent and arrested for child neglect. His last vision of Israel was being dragged screaming into a C.P.S. van, and into foster care. Elias served three years and another five of supervised probation. Now, Elias was trying to live out the rest of what remained of his life.

            The “honk” of a vehicle behind him snapped him back to the present. He squinted into the mirror and recognized it was the van from before. He couldn't see the driver through bright headlights. He couldn't shake his unease. He drove around the corner of the Sonic, parked the car and exited, milkshake in hand, determined to figure out the ominous van. He saw an odd elderly couple sitting at a table under fluorescent lights holding Raggedy Ann and Andy dolls.    

            Elias sat, back to the old couple, waiting for the van to circle around again. He looked up, startled to find the old woman staring down at him.

            “Would you like a doll?,” she mumbled.

          Elias was shocked when the old woman’s husband grabbed him and lasciviously latched onto him. Elias was easily able to force the frail old man to the ground. The old woman rushed to old man’s aid, shielding him from a fight.

            “I didn't realize you were a fella,” the old man drooled.

            “What’s wrong with you?” Elias asked.

            “You look so pretty through my glasses. Thought you were a girl. And your smell! Men shouldn't smell like that. Like roses!”

            “It was the shake, idiot!” Elias threw that milkshake at the couple, knocking the dolls out of their hands. The shocked couple shambled away, leaving chocolate-covered dolls on the concrete.

            Elias ran to his car to find the still idling van parked next to him, headlights blaring. Elias noticed the van driver's door opening. A woman stepped out. It was Emile. She hadn't aged a day since that fateful game of hide and seek.

            Emile walked toward Elias, who noticed her blank corneas, but was too stunned for them to mean anything. It wasn't until he saw fangs protruding from her familiar lips that he questioned. Emile reached her hand out. She held a Sonic milkshake, purchased after 8 PM, he assumed.

            Elias reached for it.

            Emile opened her mouth and devoured Elias' hand. She turned her head and ripped Elias' arm clean out of the socket. Elias felt nothing. Emile faced Elias and he saw her true form serenaded in darkness.

            Emile was still holding the ½ price milkshake, but was sipping it from a straw made of his dripping aorta.